Only you can know how much time and effort you’ve put into your search, and how many hurdles you’ve had to get over, to arrive at the point where you finally connect with one of the ladies whose profiles caught your eye. It might have often seemed like you spent time writing interesting things about yourself, taking good photos for your profile, and sending all those messages to say hello, just to watch them to disappear into a great, black void without a response. Now finally your efforts have paid off and you’ve sparked what you think is a real start with someone. She’s responding to your messages and so far seems interested in what she’s seen of you. At this point, you’re hoping that everything continues to go well.
Don’t Get Too Confident
As crucial as these first initial messages were to getting the ball rolling on actually meeting up with her in person, it’s important not to think that you can sit back now and everything will continue to work out. You still need to put in the same kind of effort and thought into what you say and do that got her interested and talking to you in the first place. So that means, basically, you need to keep acting like whatever guy she thinks you are. Keep yourself from getting too cocky by pretending each conversation with her is the first one. Don’t push too hard, or too soon. Look to what she says and how she responds, for your cues as to what kind of pace she’s comfortable with. Until you actually get to meet and hook up with this girl in person, your task is by no means done.
Keep Your Cool With Her
Conversely, you can accidentally ruin the good thing you’ve got going by being too concerned and self-conscious about what you’re saying and doing. You’re got to get yourself thinking and acting like it’s only natural that things seem to be working out. If you pretend to yourself “it’s no big deal”, this attitude of cool is going to reflect in your messages and conversations with her. Self-confidence is very attractive to women. Insecurity is not.
Don’t End Your Search Just Yet
Just like searching for a job, it can be easier to find and talk to women when you don’t feel yourself under a lot of pressure to do so. If you find yourself suddenly getting good response rates to the messages you’re sending out, take it as your cue to ramp up your search even more and so increase your odds of scoring dates. Definitely don’t stop checking out other women now, and not until you’ve sealed the deal with at least one. If you already know, or even just pretend, that you’ll have other dating options if one girl doesn’t work out, it will be actually less likely that you’ll choke and screw things up for some reason or another.